I have just been asked to “not sweat the small stuff”. I was not aware that I was, so I looked back at my past few hours and days, and it seemed to me that I have not been sweating the small stuff.
There are a lot of avenues I have been lately chanelling my energies into. My son, and less so, my daughter who is an adult, my work, and my future in a career I have started building rather late in life. My rising awareness that other people in my age group have long established themselves in a career, and income, and are looking forward to the days of retirement, albeit not too close, with complacence. I have not chanelled my energy in their direction, but more so in working out what I can do to be able to face that same situation with the same contentment. After all, retirement is not as far off as it used to be.
For various reasons my will, my wishes and my special gifts, are not things I am really in touch with. Apparently, my dance was a gift I could have built my life upon. While I was passionate about my dance, the career building never quite happened. Other than that I have never had any amazing talents, visitations from the Divine, huge callings from within that I have ever felt I could take and run with.
Like millions, maybe billions, of others, my life has been a daily tramping of the mundane and the ever familiar. What has been dissimilar, is that I have now reached a point in my life where I am dissatisfied with the road popularly traversed, and unable to forge my own because I don’t know which one is my own. There is no shame in the mundane. After all, people reach a level of satisfaction with their “mundanity” that I have not reached with my search for the spark.
So I did not think that this was small stuff that I had been sweating, not for the past few weeks or days, but for the past few years. But perhaps it is? Perhaps it is all small stuff. Perhaps my sweating is what has stopped me from seeing something that is glaringly obvious? Perhaps it is time to release, relax and let go? Even more than I think I have?
Definitely worth a try. Perhaps it is time to stop the sweat and allow the drops of awareness come together and lead me to a flow. One that is completely mine.
image credit: http://hdwallsource.com/nature-12758.html